William Gladstone and Benjamin Disraeli were two of the fiercest political rivals of the 19th century. Their epic battles for control of the British Empire were marked by intense animosity that spilled over from the public arena into their personal lives. Ambitious, powerful, and politically astute, both men were spirited competitors and masterful politicians.

Though each man achieved impressive accomplishments for Britain, the quality that separated them as leaders was their approach to people. The difference is best illustrated by the account of a young woman who dined with the men on consecutive nights. When asked about her impression of the rival statesmen, she said, “When I left the dining room after sitting next to Mr. Gladstone, I thought he was the cleverest man in England. But after sitting next to Mr. Disraeli, I thought I was the cleverest woman in England.”

What distinguished Disraeli from Gladstone was charisma. Disraeli possessed a personal charm sorely lacking in the leadership style of his rival. His personal appeal attracted friends and created favorable impressions among acquaintances. Throughout his career, Disraeli’s charisma gave him an edge over Gladstone.

UNDERSTANDING CHARISMA
Of all leadership attributes, charisma is perhaps the least understood.
At first glance, charisma appears to be an invisible energy or magnetism. There’s no denying its presence, but it’s hard to put a finger on its source. Some mistakenly believe charisma is a birth trait— embedded in certain personalities, but completely absent in others.

I believe charisma is both explainable and learnable. I also believe charisma helps to boost a leader’s influence. That’s why I included it in my book, The 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader. In this lesson, I’d like to examine the causes of charisma and teach you how to increase the charisma you display as a leader.

THE QUALITIES OF A CHARISMATIC LEADER
Charisma is defined as, “The ability to inspire enthusiasm, interest, or affection in others by means of personal charm or influence.” Leaders who have this special ability share four things in common:

1) They Love Life

Leaders who attract a following are passionate about life. They are celebrators, not complainers. They’re characterized by joy and warmth.
They’re energetic and radiant in an infectious way.

Look no further than the smile to illustrate the power of charisma. When people see a smile, they respond with a smile. If you’re skeptical, try it. Smile at cashiers, waiters, co-workers, etc. You’ll find your smile earns a reciprocate smile almost every time. We are hardwired to take on the energy of those around us. Leaders who love life have charisma because they fill the room with positive energy.

2) They Value the Potential in People

To become an attractive leader, expect the best from your people. I describe this behavior as “putting a 10 on everyone’s head.” Leaders see people, not as they are, but as they could be. From this vantage point, they help others to build a bridge from the present to a preferred future.

Benjamin Disraeli understood and practiced this concept, and it was one of the secrets to his charisma. He once said, “The greatest good you can do for another is not to share your riches but to reveal to him his own.” When you invest in people and lift them toward their potential, they will love you for it.

3) They Give Hope

People have an inner longing to improve their future and their fortunes.
Charismatic leaders connect with people by painting tomorrow brighter than today. To them, the future is full of amazing opportunities and unrealized dreams.

Napoleon Bonaparte once said, “Leaders are dealers in hope.” They infuse optimism into the culture around them, and they boost morale. While attentive to the current reality, they do not resign themselves to present circumstance.

4) They Share Themselves

Leaders with charisma add value to people by sharing wisdom, resources, and even special occasions. They embrace the power of inclusion, inviting others to join them for learning experiences, brainstorming sessions, or simply a cup of coffee. Such leaders embrace team spirit and value togetherness. As a result, charismatic leaders are not lonely at the top.

When it comes to charisma, the bottom line is other mindedness. For leaders, the greatest satisfaction is found by serving. They find great pleasure celebrating the successes of those around them, and the victory they enjoy the most is a team triumph.

SUMMARY
In closing, charisma has substance. It’s not manipulative energy or a magical gift endowed upon select personalities. Rather, it’s an attractive blend of learnable qualities.

Furthermore, charisma compounds a leader’s influence. Without it, leaders have trouble inspiring passion and energizing their teams. With it, leaders draw out the best in their people, give the best of themselves, and find the greatest fulfillment.

The Hebrew term for gratitude is hikarat hatov, which means, literally, “recognizing the good.” Practicing gratitude means recognizing the good that is already yours.

If you’ve lost your job, but you still have your family and health, you have something to be grateful for.

If you can’t move around except in a wheelchair but your mind is as sharp as ever, you have something to be grateful for.

If you’ve broken a string on your violin, and you still have three more, you have something to be grateful for.

When you open up to the trait of gratitude, you see clearly and accurately how much good there is in your life.

When you open up to the trait of gratitude, you see clearly and accurately how much good there is in your life. Gratitude affirms. Those things you are lacking are still there, and in reaching for gratitude no one is saying you ought to put on rose-colored glasses to obscure those shortcomings. But most of us tend to focus so heavily on the deficiencies in our lives that we barely perceive the good that counterbalances them.

There is no limit to what we don’t have and if that is where we put our focus, then our lives will inevitably be filled with endless dissatisfaction. This is the ethos that lies behind the great biblical proverb, “Who is rich? Those who rejoice in their own lot” (Pirkei Avot 4:1).

When you live charged with gratitude, you will give thanks for anything or anyone who has benefited you, whether they meant to or not. Imagine a prayer of thanks springing to your lips when the driver in the car next to you lets you merge without protest, or when the water flows from the tap, or the food is adequate?

When gratitude is this well established, it is a sign of a heart that has been made right and whole. Gratitude can’t coexist with arrogance, resentment, and selfishness. The Hasidic teacher Rebbe Nachman of Breslov writes, “Gratitude rejoices with her sister joy and is always ready to light a candle and have a party. Gratitude doesn’t much like the old cronies of boredom, despair and taking life for granted.”

To what and whom should we feel thankful? In the Torah, when Moses brought the plagues onto Egypt, he wasn’t the one who initiated turning the Nile River into blood and bringing frogs from the river. His brother Aaron invoked those plagues. The medieval commentator Rashi explains that since the river had protected Moses when he was an infant, he could not start a plague against it. God was teaching Moses a powerful lesson in gratitude: we can open in gratitude even to inanimate objects.

Whenever Rabbi Menachem Mendel, the Kotzker Rebbe, replaced a pair of worn out shoes, he would neatly wrap up the old ones in newspaper before placing them in the trash, and he would declare, “How can I simply toss away such a fine pair of shoes that have served me so well these past years!?” I felt the same way when I gave away my 1984 Honda that had ferried me so reliably for 18 years.

The Mussar teacher Rabbi Eliyahu Lopian (1872 - 1970) was once talking to a student after prayers, and at the same time was folding up his tallis [prayer shawl]. The tallis was large and he had to rest it on a bench to fold it. After he had finished the folding, Reb Elyah noticed that the bench was dusty, and so he headed out to fetch a towel to wipe it off. The student to whom he was speaking realized what Reb Elyah was doing and ran to get the towel for him. Reb Elyah held up his hand. “No! No! I must clean it myself, for I must show my gratitude to the bench upon which I folded my tallis¹.”

If we can be grateful to rivers, shoes, cars, and benches, which help us involuntarily, how much more so to human beings who have free will and who help us consciously out of the goodness of their hearts? Or to the mysterious source out of which our lives have come? When Leah, wife of the patriarch Jacob, had her fourth child, she named him “Yehudah,” which means, “I am grateful,” to reflect her gratitude to God for the gift of another son. The name Yehudah is the source of the Hebrew name of the Jewish people (Yehudim), revealing the very direct tie between Judaism and gratitude.

Gratitude opens the heart and that’s why it provides a fine orientation equally to the inanimate, human and divine dimensions of the world.

A simple and effective way to practice gratitude is by making giving thanks part of your everyday life. For example, it is an established Jewish practice to recite 100 such blessings a day. The term for “blessing” in Hebrew is bracha, which comes from the same root as the Hebrew word for “knee.” When you say a blessing, it is as if you have bent your knee in an act of gratitude. The habit of saying blessings can remind you to be thankful when you hit a green light, or the salad is fresh, or the garden is getting the rain it needs, or your child came home from school as usual.

Can you see how such a practice might slowly but insistently change your orientation to the world and your life?

By Dr. Alan Morinis 

Is thankfulness a survival skill? Perhaps most of you would respond with, “No, Jim, thankfulness is not key to survival”, and I would tend to agree with you. Most of us have probably already solved the necessary problems of survival, gone beyond that and are now working to achieve our desires. But let me give you this key phrase, “Learn to be thankful for what you already have, while you pursue all that you want.” I believe one of the greatest and perhaps one of the simplest lessons in life we can learn is to be thankful for what we have already received and accomplished.

Both the years and the experiences have brought me here to where I stand today, but it is the thankfulness that opened the windows of opportunities, of blessings, of unique experiences to flow my way. My gratitude starts with my parents who raised me, gave me an incredible foundation that has lasted me all of these years and continues with the mentors that I’ve met along the way who absolutely changed and revolutionized my life, my income, my bank account, my future. I am also very thankful for the people, the associations, for the ideas, for the chance to work and labor, and to produce results, all of that has brought me to this place, to this weekend. I’m grateful for it all.

What a unique opportunity each one of you here has, so many of us; representing different countries, nations and cultures, to appreciate the uniqueness of our own experiences that has brought us all here, together, for these three days to learn new skills and sharpen old ones. For the countries we represent; we have freedom and liberty. These are extraordinary times, about eleven years ago the walls came tumbling down, in Germany, and it started a wave of democracy and freedom like the world has never seen before. We as a country and as a world have so much to be thankful for. Always start with thanksgiving; be thankful for what you already have and see the miracles that come from this one simple act.

Now thankfulness is just the beginning; next, you’ve got to challenge yourself to produce. Produce more ideas than you need for yourself so you can share and give your ideas away. That is called fruitfulness and abundance. Here’s what I think fruitfulness and abundance mean - to go to work on producing more than you need for yourself so you can begin blessing others, blessing your nation and blessing your enterprise. Once abundance starts to come, once someone becomes incredibly productive, it’s amazing what the numbers turn out to be. But to begin this incredible process of blessing, it often starts with the act of thanksgiving and gratitude, being thankful for what you already have and for what you’ve already done. Begin the act of thanksgiving today and watch the miracles flow your way