Tough and challenging times will surely come. That is a given. The question is what kind of leadership we will demonstrate during those times. Those who are weak leaders will see lasting damage done, if not see the organization fall apart completely. With Extraordinary Leaders at the helm, however, an organization can actually become stronger and thrive in spite of the tough and challenging times. That should be our goal, so here are some ideas on how to be an Extraordinary Leader in tough and challenging times!

1. Keep Your Eye on the Big Picture. When things get tough, everybody’s temptation is to become acutely focused on the problem. The Extraordinary Leader, however, will keep his or her eye on the big picture. This doesn’t mean that we don’t address the problem. In fact, we have to address the problem. But what separates a leader from a follower is that the leader doesn’t get caught up in the problem. The leader sees the big picture and keeps moving toward the vision. The further they take their followers toward the vision, the further away from the problem they get.

2. Don’t Get Caught in the War or the Friendly Fire. When it gets tough even the most loyal team members can be tempted to start shooting and, unfortunately, they sometimes shoot each other! Rather than focusing on the enemy on the outside, they begin to question each other and find many faults with one another that they normally would not have seen. The Extraordinary Leader is the one who can keep from being drug into the fray. They keep their eye on the big picture and act rationally and objectively. They understand that people are heated and are saying things they don’t really mean. The people are firing because they are angry or scared. The Extraordinary Leader understands this and rises above it. This way, they take fewer arrows and they set the example for their followers.

3. Be First to Sacrifice. When it gets tough, like when there has to be cuts in salaries etc, the leader should do just that - lead. They need to not only be the one who is rewarded the greatest when all is well, but they need to be the first to sacrifice. The Extraordinary leader says, “I know many of you are concerned with the salary cuts. I am too. In the long run we will be healthy again but for the mean time, this is necessary. Understanding this, I want you to know that I am taking a 20% pay reduction myself. I want you to know that we are in this together.” The Extraordinary Leader is the first to sacrifice and will be rewarded with the loyalty of his or her followers.

4. Remain Calm. Panic is one of the basest of human emotions and no one is immune to it. The Extraordinary Leader, however, takes time out regularly to think the issues through so they can remain calm. They remind themselves that all is not lost and there will be another day. They remind themselves that being calm will enable them to make the best decisions - for themselves and for their followers. Panic only leads to disaster, while calm leads to victory.

5. Motivate. In tough and challenging times, people are naturally down. They tend to be pessimistic. They can’t see how it is all going to work out. Thus, they have a hard time getting going. The Extraordinary Leader knows this and will focus in on being the optimistic motivator. He or she will come to the office knowing that for the time being, the mood of the group will be carried and buoyed by them and their attitude. Above all else, they seek to show how the end result will be good - and with this they motivate their followers to continue on, braving the current storms, and on to their shared destiny.

6. Create Small Wins. One of the ways to motivate is to create small wins. The Extraordinary Leader knows that in tough times his or her people think that all is lost. They wonder if they can win. So the Extraordinary Leader creates opportunities for the team to win, even if they are small. They set smaller, more achievable goals and remind and reward the team members when they hit those goals. With each small win, the leader is building the esteem and attitude of his followers, digging them out of their self-created hole of fear.

7. Keep a Sense of Humor. Look, hardly anything in life can’t be laughed at. The Extraordinary Leader knows that even if the whole company goes down the drain, we still go home to our families and live a life of love with them. The Extraordinary Leader keeps perspective and knows that we humans act irrationally when we get scared and fail, and sometimes that is humorous. Don’t ever laugh at someone’s expense in this situation, because that will be perceived as cold and heartless, regardless of what you meant by it, but do keep the ability to laugh at yourself and the situations that present themselves. By doing this you will keep yourself and your team in an attitude that will eventually beat the tough times.

The young boy, the young girl, says, “Someday when I get out of school, move away from home and start to college, I’m really going to have fun, I’ll be happy and life will be great.” The college student says, “Someday when I graduate, get my degree, get a job, my own apartment, I’ll be happy and am really gonna’ live!” The young couple says, “When we get moved into our new home, get that promotion and join the Country Club, we’ll really be happy and life will be so good.” Mother and father say, “Someday, when those kids get out of school and we get this place paid off, we’re really gonna’ be happy and truly enjoy life.” The accountant says, “When tax season’s over…”; the teacher says, “When school’s out…”; the farmer says, “When the crops are in…”; the technician says, “When this program’s completed…”; the engineer says, “When this job’s done…”; the speaker/entertainer says, “When this tour’s finished…”; the candidate says, “When I’m elected…”; the coach/player says, “When the season’s over…”; the statistician says, “When all the numbers are in…”; the health minister says, “When I see what the others are gonna’ do…”; … ad infinitum. The older couple says, “Someday when we retire, we’re really gonna’ enjoy life, do all those things we’ve been wanting to do but never seemed to take time to do…we’re gonna’ be happy ‘n have a good time then!”

On the way out, they look back longingly and say, “Wow! If only I had it to do over again, I’d have gone barefoot to school in the spring like Billy Bob did… ‘n slipped off to the creek with Ralph Raymond and Joe Day to go swimming after school like they did. If only I hadn’t gotten married so young, I’d have gone to Alaska with Ed, Kendall and Pete… what fun that would have been! If only I’d borrowed the money, taken the chance, and developed that idea of mine into a business like Ed did instead of taking a job with the Grist Mill because of the security they offered, two weeks vacation with pay each year… a company car and expense account… an insurance program… retirement, social security, ‘n a gold watch. If only I could do it over again, I’d smile more, worry less… I’d take chances, I’d travel to exotic places, meeting interesting people, ride motorcycles, fly airplanes and hot air balloons… I’d hike mountain trails, zip across the desert, camp out, canoe, portage, fish, hunt, laugh, love and live! Oh, if only I could live it all over, I’d take better care of myself, exercise more often, drink less booze ‘n more juice… eat less fat ‘n more veggies. I’d treasure every day, love everybody, thank God for my blessings and lessons, my successes and my setbacks…” if only…”, I’d be happy and truly live every day!”

There’s an old fable…and the title of a recent great book by Mark L. Feldman and Michael F. Spratt that goes, “There were five frogs on a log… four of ‘em decided to jump. How many frogs are left on the log?

The most common answer is one. The second most popular answer is none… because, they reason, if four decided to jump, the remaining frog probably went along with the majority. The right answer is five!

Deciding to do something and taking the action to do it, are two entirely different things! My Daddy used to say, “Aiming to, don’t pick no cotton!”

The leaders… the real winners in life are the ones who evaluate the situation, make a decision and take action! Got something that’s bothering you? Write out in a clear, complete statement, not a question, the challenge you are facing. Ask yourself, “What are the causes of this situation?” Often you resolve it there… if not… then ask yourself, “What are all the possible answers to this challenge?” Write out all the possible answers… brainstorm, don’t evaluate. Then review all the possible answers… decide on the best possible answer… then ACT… do it now!

Get rid of the “Someday I’m gonna’…” and the “If only…” syndrome, and get on with LIFE!  

…then get out of the kitchen”.

By using “Shaw’s five-step plan” you will soon you will develop the power of confidence and courage that will inspire you to take action. You will feel more excitement and clarity in your life everyday. You will be motivated like never before and easily “beat the heat”.

Dr. C. Ward Crampton, former director of physical training in the New York public schools, always urged his patients to exercise. That was way back in the first half of the 20th century, when he practiced. He specifically prescribed what he called his “miracle exercise.”

Dr. Crampton’s miracle exercise does not require special clothing or equipment. You don’t have to get down on the floor or go through a series of contortions that will leave you breathless. You can stand or sit down. It works well if you do it in front of a mirror, or better still, with someone. Here it is:

• Raise the corners of your mouth an inch, take a deep breath and hold it for 10 seconds.
• You are smiling. If you have people watching you, they’ll probably start smiling too.
• Now release your breath in short exhalations. You’re now laughing. Unless those other people are curmudgeons, they’ll undoubtedly start laughing too.

This simple muscular action of inhaling, while raising the corners of your mouth and exhaling in rhythmic, short bursts, causes the diaphragm to bounce up and down. It pats the liver on the back, and pleasantly vibrates the stomach. The heart, which rests above the diaphragm, begins to pump at a slightly faster rate, sending blood coursing throughout the body.

The effect, Dr. Crampton explained, is a general feeling of well-being. More important than this, however, is the effect on others who observe you going through this exercise. They feel better, too. This triggers happy emotions within you, and the stage is set for any number of pleasant personal and business relationships. All this from one simple little exercise!

I learned years ago that one of the most powerful things you can do to sell successfully is to smile at prospects. Never underestimate the value of a smile. It should be standard equipment for all people. You shouldn’t come to work without a smile. And be sure to take it home with you at the end of the workday!

Smiling is the universal language. People like smiles a lot more than frowns. Many careers have been enhanced because of the presence of a bright smile. Who can match Tiger Woods’ million-dollar smile, or for that matter, his endorsements? The entertainment and sports business are full of examples—Oprah Winfrey, George Clooney, Bette Midler, Julia Roberts, Michael Jordan, Halle Berry or maybe the greatest smile ever, that of Magic Johnson.

I remember reading an article in Newsday some years back that Holiday Inn management was looking for 500 people to fill positions for a new facility. Hotel managers interviewed 5,000 candidates and excluded all candidates who smiled fewer than four times during their interviews. And this applied to people competing for jobs in all categories.

With a name like Mackay, a lot of people mistakenly think I’m Irish, but have you ever noticed how many Irish blessings and sayings have the word smile in them? “May all your days be filled with four-leaf clovers and rainbows, smiles and laughter, and dreams come true.”

Readers of this column know that I am a big fan of Dale Carnegie, the master of making friends. I carry a poem from one of his books with me and often share it when I am speaking to groups. It’s called “The Value of a Smile,” and I hope you learn as much from it as I have.

“It costs nothing, but creates much. It enriches those who receive, without impoverishing those who give. It happens in a flash and the memory of it sometimes lasts forever. None are so rich they can get along without it, and none so poor but are richer for its benefits.

“It creates happiness in the home, fosters goodwill in a business, and is the countersign of friends. It is rest to the weary, daylight to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad, and natures best antidote for trouble.

“Yet it cannot be bought, begged, borrowed or stolen, for it is something that is no earthly good to anyone ’til it is given away. And if in the hurly-burly bustle of today’s business world, some of the people you meet should be too tired to give you a smile, may we ask you to leave one of yours?

“For nobody needs a smile so much, as those who have none left to give.”

Mackey’s Moral: The most powerful single thing you can do to influence others is to smile at them.

Everyone makes mistakes and the busier you are, the more mistakes you will make. The only question is “How well and how effectively do you deal with the inevitable ups and downs of life?”In this newsletter, you learn the difference between a positive and negative worldview. You learn how to benefit from your mistakes and how to remain positive in the face of adversity.

Let the Light Shine In
This is achieved through the simple exercise of self-disclosure. For you to truly understand yourself, or to stop being troubled by things that may have happened in your past, you must be able to disclose yourself to at least one person. You have to be able to get those things off your chest. You must rid yourself of those thoughts and feelings by revealing them to someone who won’t make you feel guilty or ashamed for what has happened. Using Stumbling Blocks as Stepping Stones
There are two ways to look at the world: the benevolent way or the malevolent way. People with a malevolent or negative worldview take a victim stance, seeing life as a continuous succession of problems and a process of unfairness and oppression. They don’t expect a lot and they don’t get much. When things go wrong, they shrug their shoulders and passively accept that this is the way life is and there isn’t anything they can do to make it better.On the other hand, people with a benevolent or positive worldview see the world around them as filled with opportunities and possibilities. They believe that everything happens as part of a great process designed to make them successful and happy. They approach their lives, their work, and their relationships with optimism, cheerfulness, and a general attitude of positive expectations. They expect a lot and they are seldom disappointed.

Flex Your Mental Muscles
When you develop the skill of learning from your mistakes, you become the kind of person who welcomes obstacles and setbacks as opportunities to flex your mental muscles and move ahead. You look at problems as rungs on the ladder of success that you grab onto as you pull your way higher.

Two of the most common ways to deal with mistakes are invariably fatal to high achievement. The first common but misguided way to handle a mistake is the failure to accept it when it occurs. According to statistics, 70 percent of all decisions we make will be wrong. That’s an average. This means that some people will fail more than 70 percent of the time, and some people will fail less. It is hard to believe that most of the decisions we make could turn out to be wrong in some way. In fact, if this is the case, how can our society continue to function at all?Cut Your Losses
The fact is that our society, our families, our companies, and our relationships continue to survive and thrive because intelligent people tend to cut their losses and minimize their mistakes. It is only when people refuse to accept that they have made a bad choice or decision-and prolong the consequences by sticking to that bad choice or decision-that mistakes become extremely expensive and hurtful.

Learn From Your Mistakes
The second common approach that people take with regard to their mistakes, one that hurts innumerable lives and careers, is the failure to use your mistakes to better yourself and to improve the quality of your mind and your thinking.Learning from your mistakes is an essential skill that enables you to develop the resilience to be a master of change rather than a victim of change. The person who recognizes that he has made a mistake and changes direction the fastest is the one who will win in an age of increasing information, technology and competition.

By remaining fast on your feet, you will be able to out-play and out-position your competition. You will become a creator of circumstances rather than a creature of circumstances.

Action Exercises
Now, here are three steps you can take immediately to put these ideas into action.First, imagine that your biggest problem or challenge in life has been sent to you at this moment to help you, to teach you something valuable. What could it be?

Second, be willing to cut your losses and walk away if you have made a mistake or a bad choice. Accept that you are not perfect, you can’t be right all the time, and then get on with your life.

Third, learn from every mistake you make. Write down every lesson it contains. Use your mistakes in the present as stepping stones to great success in the future.

There just isn’t time to do all you want to do and all that you need do. It is easy for us to teach abandonment to others, but the leader knows the price of abandonment, beginning with his own thought processes.

What do you think about? Let’s go a step further, what do you talk about? Someone once said that little people talk about things, medium sized people talk about people, and big people talk about ideas. Which kind of people do you like to be around?

How are your reading habits; how many books have your read this year, how many are you reading now, how many of the ideas you’ve received from the books have you shared? The power of a single book at the right time in a life is unlimited.  

The leader leads the way, showing that leaders are readers. You should not only keep a flow of books for yourself, but give them away. Paperbacks are inexpensive and popular. I share a book list that points out the books that have been the most influential of my life.

The leader is constantly learning to abandon the things that come naturally, like DISCOURAGEMENT. Discouragement is, without a doubt, the most expensive luxury we can afford. When I become wealthy, I plan to get discouraged for a week at a time, but I can’t afford but a few minutes a day right now. Most people I know must really be wealthy now, for all the discouragement they seem to be enjoying. Sometimes I’m asked if I ever get discouraged, and I reply, “yes, often.” But I never let anyone know about it, because if I allow you to know how discouraged I am, you’ll become discouraged, you’ll discourage me more than I am, and I can’t hardly stand how much I have now. So abandon discouragement and all the other attitude killers as you become the leader you are meant to be!

“If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant; if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome.” Anne Bradstreet (1612-1672)
British-American poet

They say that “everybody’s a critic,” and that never seems truer than when you’re pursuing a dream. There will always be well-meaning people who want to “protect” you from your “unrealistic fantasies.”  Critics tried to discourage the people profiled in Unstoppable.  Everyone ignored the negative input and achieved their goals.  Follow their lead and you, too, will be UNSTOPPABLE!

1. The timing is all wrong. In 1987, prior to accepting Paramount’s offer to host a late-night talk show, Arsenio Hall was told by everyone: “It’s too hard to crack into the late-night ratings. Television isn’t ready for a black talk show host. This is America, and you can forget it.”

2. Why don’t you get a real job? Not understanding his desire to become Mr. Universe, Arnold Schwarzenegger’s family pleaded with him, saying: “How long will you go on training all day in a gymnasium and living in a dream world?”

3. It’ll never work, you’ll lose everything. Weeks before she opened her first store, cosmetic tycoon Mary Kay Ash’s attorney said: “Liquidate the business right now and recoup whatever cash you can. If you don’t, you’ll end up penniless.”

4. Don’t rock the boat. In response to Muriel Siebertís application to be the first woman to buy a seat on the New York Stock Exchange, officials responded: “The language on the floor is too rough and there’s no ladies’ room.”  She bought a seat anyway and remained the only woman there for nine years.

5. It’s never been done before. Upon applying for a job after graduation from Columbia University, announcers for NBC Radio responded to Sally Jessy Raphael: “You have the perfect voice for broadcasting, but you should get a job as a secretary. We’re not using women.”

6. You don’t have enough talent. Responding to his desire to become a recording artist, Ray Charles’ teachers said: “You can’t play the piano, and God knows you can’t sing. You’d better learn how to weave chairs so you can support yourself.”

7. Don’t even try, you’ll just be disappointed. When auditioning for a part in a high school musical, a teacher rejected Diana Ross saying: “You have a nice voice, but it’s nothing special.”

8. You don’t fit the mold OR you’re not the right “type.” Trying to convince her she didn’t have the right look, fashion photographer Richard Avedon told Cher: “You will never make the cover of Vogue because you don’t have blond hair or blue eyes.”  When she did make the cover, Vogue sold more copies than it had ever sold before.

9. Don’t give up your day job. Commenting on the first manuscript of an unpublished author, a New York publisher told James Michener: “You’re a good editor with a promising future in the business. Why would you want to throw it all away to try to be a writer? I read your book. Frankly, it’s not really that good.” Michener’s first book, Tales of the South Pacific, later won a Pulitzer Prize and was adapted for stage and screen as South Pacific.

10. There’s no market for it. When hearing his plans to launch Perrier in the United States, several consulting firms advised Gustave Leven: “You’re foolish to try to sell sparkling water in the land of Coca-Cola drinkers.”

The only opinion about your dream that really counts is yours. The negative comments of others merely reflect their limitations — not yours. There is nothing unrealistic about a dream that aligns with your purpose, ignites your passion, and inspires you to plan and persevere until you attain it. On the contrary, it’s unrealistic to expect a person with such drive and commitment not to succeed.

Choose to be unstoppable!
Cynthia Kersey